“Comparison is the root of all feelings of inferiority.”-James Dobson
For a many years of my life, I struggled with self-esteem. A contributor to this was being constantly focused on what I didn’t have. It didn’t matter what it was…it could have been a personality trait or a thing or…whatever. Everywhere I looked there were people who had what I wished I had. I never thought about what I did have, because I was too busy comparing myself with others.
That began to change as I poured myself into personal development over two decades ago. My time reading the bible and the host of other books, as well as listening to the wisdoms of people who had taken the time to develop themselves, slowly began to change my understanding…change my thinking…and this was the beginning of true change for me. So here are some thoughts for you to reflect on if you ever struggle with comparing yourself to others.
You are a unique creation. You have been blessed with all kinds of wonderful attributes. The day you stop focusing on what you don’t have and become grateful for what you have been blessed with, is the day you can begin to better develop those gifts and begin taking huge strides toward the life you are intended to lead.
Using comparisons from a personal perspective leads to deferring responsibility. When we limit our choices or efforts because we think others can based on who they are, and we cannot based on who we are…we are really choosing to be selectively irresponsible…we are saying I am not responsible for using my gifts because I don’t perceive I have the necessary gifts. The truth is, that if something is in your heart to do, you DO have the gifts necessary, and thus you do have a responsibility to take the steps.
Comparing to others is not truly even possible. What I mean by this is that you don’t know much about those you attempt to compare to. You only know the little that you see. You might see an attribute that you would like to have…but do you know the price of this attribute? There is a yin and yang to everything. It’s easy to romaniticize something as being perfect…nothing earthly is without flaw.
Recognize that you tend to compare to the best of the area you compare. If you were to take the reverse approach and look around you and reflect on how blessed you are in comparison to many others….well, this is an easy one to understand.
In general, avoid comparison. Focus on how to better use your own blessings, with a grateful spirit, in the pursuit of what is in your heart to do.
