A few days ago, I was on the phone with a very talented young woman. She was sharing with me how the consistent antics of someone in her office were affecting her ability to get her work done. I told her she should be thankful for this person. To which she said “huh?”
If you work in an organization that is more than just a few people, there is a high probability that you have to work with someone who is obnoxious, or arrogant, or pompous, or disruptive, or duplicitous, or mean-spirited, or grand-standing, or brown-nosing, or a blatant climber, or…you fill in the blank. For simplicity sake let’s just call them the”office jerk.”
This is the person that affects you so much that you might have visions of anvil’s dropping on their head ( a cartoon anvil, not a real one:-)!
Sooooo, back to the point. Why should we be thankful? Here are a few realities:
- They may not be as you perceive them at all. It could be YOU that is actually seeing them with a clouded lens. Be thankful they give you a chance to reflect on yourself. Of course, if other people are responding to this person the same way you are, then it probably is them, but reflect anyway…is there anything in their behavior that you dislike that you see also in yourself?
- They are teaching you how NOT to behave. Often in life, it’s just as important to learn what NOT to do as it is learning what TO do. Jim Rohn used to talk about taking failures to lunch to ask them how they messed up so bad! Be thankful for this valuable lesson.
- They are teaching you acceptance. It’s not always important to be friends, but you should be friendly. Some people, who are awesome people, are just going to rub your the wrong way in life. Often these people have many great attributes mixed in with the stuff you don’t like. You will need to be able to operate at a high level in life regardless of who you are working with, which means you’ll have to learn to accept things you don’t like for the sake of accomplishing the goal. Be thankful for this lesson.
- Patience. I truly don’t know a single human being who doesn’t need to work on being patient. This person is advancing you up your patience growth curve.
- They are an agent of personal growth. I have only touched on a few of the most obvious positive impacts that this person is having on you. For each of us, there are several other things that are unique to the character that we are dealing with, so it’s better to just couch this as personal development. Anything that pushes against you in a situation where you cannot run away, will help you to be better.
We all need to give grace when we encounter someone of this ilk. We are not in their shoes. We don’t know why they behave the way they do, nor do we know the life they have lived. What we do know though, is that through human kindness, empathy, and an open heart, we can shape a positive relationship with them.
But in the meantime, keep a tennis ball in your desk to squeeze, so you don’t lose your mind while you are learning all the great lessons!
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Many Blessings,
Todd
P.S. The Blueprint Process Digital Training has been getting awesome reviews and will help you deeply in mastering all aspects of the process of building the business. Click here to check it out.
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