What Keeps You from Accomplishing the Things That You Want?
This is a broad question I know, but it is ONE of THE questions to address in any worthwhile pursuit. You know what you want deep down. That’s easy to figure out…you simply think about the things that keep you up at night/worry you…and this is what you want to eliminate or improve, and you think about the things that you yearn to have/do/be, and these are the things you aren’t addressing yet…or have started to address and now they are in the “keep you up at night” category!
I’m certain that you, like me, can always point to many reasons why we don’t seem to be able to do the thing…
But in the bigger picture, when it’s just us and the mirror, we know that those are just excuses. Some of them are legitimate barriers/obstacles and are not easy to navigate, but that doesn’t keep us from getting the thing we want. Our unwillingness to do what it takes to push through the obstacle is truly the reason…NOT the obstacle.
Your Obstacles are Unique to You And…
Everyone’s situation and circumstances are different. Add to this, that values, inclinations, experiences, etc. are also different.
Having said this, there is ONE obstacle, which I called “Internal Enemy” in the title of this article, that all human beings share, and this obstacle is patience. Or maybe I should say “LACK” of patience. Yes, fear, lack of confidence, comfort zone, lack of skills, rough roads, COVID, and the list goes on, are all obstacles…AND ALL can be overcome with action coupled with patience.
When you look at our world today, you can see societally the impact of “instant gratification.” The collective state of physical health, the collective state of financial health, the collective state of “quiet desperation,” the state of the environment, and you can continue the thread in your head.
Instant gratification is the opposite of patience. Have to have it now! We are cultured and conditioned this way by all the messaging we receive and also by the advancement of society technologically in general. This sits on top of our nature. We are clearly not born patient.
Does a baby patiently wait for their mother to feed them, change them, pick them up?
Everywhere in our life where we have struggle, we can see impatience involved. It takes patience to accomplish anything of value and significance, from getting healthy and fit to building a company.
Og Mandino said “Favor me with alertness to recognize opportunity; yet endow me with patience to concentrate my strength.”
Meaning…we see something and get busy and then…SQUIRREL….we are looking at something else…mostly because the thing we started was not important enough…or in the case of what I am addressing here, the progress isn’t happening at the speed we wanted when we romanticized having it.
So How DO We Turn This Enemy into our Friend?
We work with it. If it’s human nature to be impatient, then don’t focus on changing human nature, learn how to use it to your advantage. This is an EQ (emotional intelligence) issue. First we have to have the self-awareness to recognize that this is a “feeling” to be managed. But we don’t just want to manage it. We want to go from manage to utilize.
To utilize it we need to know it’s value. So…What’s good about the patience challenge?
In short order…It means you care. You are determined. You are constantly thinking of and working on ways to improve. You are not satisfied. Nor should you be. Everyday on this earth is a chance to have a greater and greater impact. Your impatience will drive you to impact more. It will drive your creativity. It will drive your learning…is this enough? I could go on, but you get the picture!
The blessings of impatience then are….
You more value the thing as you achieve it.
It increases your ability to tolerate discomfort…since essentially that’s what impatience is…as form of irritation.
It fosters creating better avenues and improvements in the path.
It improves your work ethic.
It makes accomplishment sweeter in the moment and indelible in your mind for the next leg of life journeys. when you reach it.
It drives you to be better.
Now that you have all these nuggets…here is two very effective strategies to employ:
Urgent Patience: This is where you are accepting of the fact, that whatever you are doing will take consistency in the process of the effort over time. You shift your urgency from result to action. You approach each day with the urgency (impatience) of doing the actions that will lead to the result over time…then you are able to relax knowing you have done your part for the day. Be impatient about taking action and urgently take it with consistency.
Patient Impatience: This is where you have developed the self-awareness to know that you will NEVER truly be patient. However, you can decide to become patient with this reality. Be patient with your impatience, as in do not be hard on yourself or cruel in self-judgement. Don’t turn your impatience with the duration of the effort into anger. Turn it into fuel. You know you are impatient and you are smart enough to see that it’s a positive thing that you can use by being patient with it and burning the energy in activity.
That’s enough on then topic for now. There’s more, and maybe in the future, if you’d like, I will address it further, if you let me know some specific circumstances you’d like me to share about. The below video has some relevance to this message but is about other aspects of success.
I hope you found this helpful. Please share with others if you believe they would benefit.
Here is a recent video on How to Design an Awesome Life
Many Blessings, Todd
P.S. “3 Circles Living” will not only help you condition yourself properly, but it will also give you an exact formula for achieving your richest life possible. It won’t happen overnight, but it will happen!