How Can This Be the Case?
Let’s just put this right on the table. Most of us are brought up, conditioned, cultured, trained, perhaps even educated to be really really clear on what we are NOT. What we’re not good at, where we are weak, what we don’t do well, how we look wrong, what we say wrong, and so on.
We are not generally (I know there are exceptions), brought up with encouragement to explore our unique abilities, affinities, ideas, etc. Instead we are placed in systems that focus on a very defined way of learning, and a very structured road of development where we learn many useful things, but are not taught the most important aspects of development for success in life.
With all my corporate clients, one of the most important areas of focus is the core competencies. Often the core competencies, as it relates to the work-place, are the specific competencies and skills that accomplish the work. Obviously these competencies are crucial, however, they are only ONE THIRD of the story relative to the skills that makes someone successful in the working world.
The “Other” Core Competencies Are the Key
Interpersonal skills and productivity skills are the key to becoming the best you can be in the workplace. I don’t care how skilled you are at a specific job, if you are not good with people or you are not good with using your time, you will be more of a detriment than a positive in the job.
Developing these skills is paramount, but like anything else, wouldn’t even cross someone’s mind until they were made aware that it mattered. This is what happened for me many years ago.
I used to think something was wrong with me. Being introverted and having poor esteem, led me to feel uncomfortable in practically every setting that involved other people. I thought I had a “broken personality.” I had no idea, that I had many positive attributes, and that the true problem was that I did not have the skills to navigate people situations. In other words, I saw my personal make-up as a curse rather than a blessing.
Once I learned that I could work on myself, I poured myself into doing so. This allowed me to become self-aware enough to know my tendencies, preferences, strengths, weaknesses, etc. and then to work hard at improving myself.
IF You Ever Wish You Were Like Someone Else…
Then you haven’t dug down enough to appreciate just how awesome you actually are. You haven’t identified all the positive attributes you have, what your behavioral style and tendencies are, what you are wired for.
I give you an excellent path for getting moving in this direction in the 3 Circles Living book, as I give you some of the essential basics that will help you be your best self. One of the other things that is incredibly helpful is to take one of the deep personality/behavioral profile assessments. My favorite of them, and there are several, is DISC.
While I have used and taught from DISC for several years, I recently became certified so I could offer this to my clients. It is a marvelous tool for uncovering your personal behavioral preferences/tendencies, and giving you a road map on how to further grow yourself as well as how to be your best when playing with others in the sand box.
The bottom line is that you are exactly as you should be from a raw material perspective. You just have to learn how to be the best, most effective version of yourself, and that version is one that has deep self-awareness, and then the skills and wisdom, to operate at a high level in all situations with all kinds of people.
It starts with a simple commitment to work on yourself daily. Here is a short video clip from a recent interview with Uwe Alschner about the German language release of 3 Circles Living where I talk about people saying they don’t have time to invest in self. I hope you enjoy it, and share this with others.
If you need some Coaching, or Training for your organization, reach out to me.
Many Blessings, Todd
P.S. 3 Circles Living is now available in an audiobook. Here is where you can order it if you’d like to!
